His son obeyed, and the crowd approached;
they were bawling and hissing round a dingy hearse and dingy mourning coach, in
which mourning coach there was only one mourner, dressed in the dingy trappings
that were considered essential to the dignity of the position. The position appeared
by no means to please him, however, with an increasing rabble surrounding the
coach, deriding him, making grimaces at him, and incessantly groaning and
calling out: `Yah! Spies! Tst! Yaha! Spies!' with many compliments too numerous
and forcible to repeat.
Funerals had at all times a remarkable
attraction for Mr. Cruncher; he always pricked up his senses, and became
excited, when a funeral passed Tellson's. Naturally, therefore, a funeral with
this uncommon attendance excited him greatly, and he asked of the first man who
ran against him:
`What is it, brother? What's it about?'
`I don't know,' said the man. `Spies! Yaha!
Tst! Spies!'
He asked another man. `Who is it?'
`I don't know,' returned the man, clapping
his hands to his mouth nevertheless, and vociferating in a surprising heat and
with the greatest ardour, `Spies! Yaha! Tst, tst! Spi-ies!'
At length, a person better informed on the
merits of the case, tumbled against him, and from this person he learned that
the funeral was the funeral of One Roger Cly.
`Was He a spy?' asked Mr. Cruncher.
`Old Bailey spy,' returned his informant.
`Yaha Tst! Yah! Old Bailey Spi-i-ies!'
`Why, to be sure!' exclaimed Jerry,
recalling the Trial at which he had assisted. `I've seen him. Dead, is he?'
`Dead as mutton,' returned the other, `and
can't be too dead. Have `em out, there Spies! Pull `em out, there! Spies!'
The idea was so acceptable in the prevalent
absence of any idea, that the crowd caught it up with eagerness, and, loudly
repeating the suggestion to have `em out, and to pull em out, mobbed the two
vehicles so closely that they came to a stop. On the crowd's opening the coach
doors, the one mourner scuffled out of himself and was in their hands for a
moment; but he was so alert, and made such good use of his time, that in
another moment he was scouring away up a bystreet, after shedding his cloak,
hat, long hatband, white pocket handkerchief, and other symbolical tears.
These, the people tore to pieces and
scattered far and wide with great enjoyment, while the tradesmen hurriedly shut
up their shops; for a crowd in those times stopped at nothing, and was a
monster much dreaded. They had already got the length of opening the hearse to
take the coffin out, when some brighter genius proposed instead, its being escorted
to destination amidst general rejoicing. Practical suggestions being much
needed, this suggestion, too, was received with acclamation, and the coach was
immediately filled with eight inside and a dozen out, while as many people got
on the roof of the hearse as could by any exercise of ingenuity stick upon it.
Among the first of these volunteers was Jerry Cruncher himself, who modestly
concealed his spiky head from the observation of Tellson's, in the further
corner of the mourning coach.
The officiating undertakers made some
protest against these changes in the ceremonies; but, the river being
alarmingly near, and several voices remarking on the efficacy of cold immersion
in bringing refractory members of the profession to reason, the protest was faint
and brief. The remodelled procession started, with a chimney-sweep driving the
hearse--advised by the regular driver, who was perched beside him, under close
inspection, for the purpose--and with a pieman, also attended by his cabinet
minister, driving the mourning coach. A bear-leader, a popular street character
of the time, was impressed as an additional ornament, before the cavalcade had
gone far down the Strand ; and his bear, who
was black and very mangy, gave quite an Undertaking air to that part of the
procession in which he walked.
No comments:
Post a Comment